Can someone please get Ronald Reagan in the god damn ground already? Huh? Christ's church people! He's been dead for 9 years but now that he's sloughed the mortal coil we have to delegate a week of news coverage to him? I gotta believe there's some fucking kid stuck in a well or some shit that needs some media attention too!
When I'm assassinated I only want a footnote in the Big Funky Chronicle Obituaries with my name misspelled. Book it.